Year's End Thoughts

I'm always looking for inspirations online when comes to the end of the year. As cliche as it is, I guess it's sort of become a habit, or more like an inception that we've all grown up with. All those TV shows,  people around you mentioning that it's the end of a whole year, and

all these common questions start popping up in conversations you have within the last few day before the new year.

"What's your highlight of the year?"

"Favourite moments?"

"Did you achieve your resolutions for the year?"

"What's your new year's resolution for next year?"

As much as I don't want to have to think about it, the auto-flashback in my head just screams from every corner of my brain trying to pull out as many memories as possible from the folder of my mind. It tries and it tries. Pulling out bits and pieces of what it can, start comparing them, questioning them, "Was that really a great thing that happened there?". Just a nonstop cycle. And then, I get stressed out.

That's also when the psycho starts kicking in.

This happens so often in my mind, I'm not even joking. A part of me will question, "Why care so much about it? Who cares if it was great or if you made a difference or a leap in your life, and why the hell care if it didn't? Why are you thinking so much about what you did or didn't do in the pass when you can do something about it NOW?". Meet 'Adventurous Experimental Aqila'. Kinda love her :)

And then, there's 'Bipolar Emo-Bitch Aqila'. I feel for her most of the time. However, she walks around with a huge question mark on her face EVERYWHERE she goes. Not saying having questions isn't good. But continuously questioning things that spark negativity in oneself  like self-doubt and anything in that genre, not healthy. All in all,

I think self reflection is necessarily appropriate.

Not to knock yourself down because of the things that didn't go so well, but sort of to look back, embrace that what happened, happened, and move forward.

It's like a collection of country chops you've collected in your little passport. At least that's how I see it. The argument between the two has been going on for the past two days knowing we were nearing the year's end, it was driving me nuts, especially with the workload I had and everything. Maaaan. Sometimes, you just need to write to get things off your chest. I was looking back at my old posts, and realized I'd only written ONE post throughout the whole of 2013. I just had to add at least one more :)

3 minutes left.

This was good. I might just do more of these in 2014.

Happy New Year :D

Till then!